By Paul Kayser, Head Bastard

Barry Crump was something of an expert when it came to bastards. He met all sorts of them in his meanderings around this fascinating, challenging, beautiful land. He drank with them in pubs, hunted with them in the bush, spotted them wherever he went. There was the Big Bastard, the Sneaky Bastard, the Obnoxious Bastard and even the Good Bastard. In his book "Bastards I have met", Crumpy tells humorous tales about interesting characters he met and how, in his bush-honed wisdom, he could bring an insight to the kind of bastard he, and sometimes the odd sheila, was.By Paul Kayser, Head Bastard

Barry Crump was something of an expert when it came to bastards. He met all sorts of them in his meanderings around this fascinating, challenging, beautiful land. He drank with them in pubs, hunted with them in the bush, spotted them wherever he went. There was the Big Bastard, the Sneaky Bastard, the Obnoxious Bastard and even the Good Bastard. In his book "Bastards I have met", Crumpy tells humorous tales about interesting characters he met and how, in his bush-honed wisdom, he could bring an insight to the kind of bastard he, and sometimes the odd sheila, was.Many years ago in my former self as an advertising art director, [Barry might have called me a smart-arsed bastard or something similar], I enjoyed reading his book when researching the finer attributes of what constitutes the quintessential New Zealander. The ad agency I was working for, Colenso, considered itself to be the Kiwi agency, owned [at that stage] by Kiwis, and the agency that understood the way New Zealanders thought, behaved and spent their money. We even invited Crumpy to one of our Christmas parties, which was themed "A Garden Party" and held in the Domain. It was, ironically quite English, of the upper crust variety, but later descended into more of the football laddish/loutish variety. Crumpy of course came as Crumpy and proceeded to empty the bar of its beer stocks. Not to disappoint, it wasn't long before he was merrily telling stories of a colourful nature, roll-your-own hanging from the corner of his mouth, to admiring fans. The younger, prettier of them, soon found that Crumpy also liked to get pretty "close" to these particular fans.

Crumpy was one of the more colourful bastards this fine country has known, and it was his wit that inspired me to name my new website celebrating Kiwi ingenuity and creativity, CleverBastards.co.nz. From the premise, 'Clever: A brilliant and ingenious idea. Bastard: Because you didn't think of it first', the site finds, celebrates (through telling their stories), and sells the products of diverse and brilliant emerging artists, designers and all manner of creative Kiwis from every wee nook and cranny of Aotearoa New Zild.

Some of these CleverBastards even reside right here on The Big Idea, which is no coincidence. Visit them by clicking here and support them by buying one of their creations. And you'll see what makes a bastard a CleverBastard.

By Paul Kayser, head bastard and creator of cleverbastards.co.nz