So many people these days are revving their motors like maniacs! Overworked, stressed, late, constantly sick. Sometimes we need to change gear - which is all about using the clutch, says Philip Patston.

"That means reducing acceleration and disengaging the motive power."

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I’ve been going like the clappers for the last week, trying to complete an application to Creative New Zealand to record some music to add to my creative repertoire. Getting quotes and references, writing philosophies and budgets, creating plans and rationales. I have been writing and rewriting, questioning my motives for wanting to do this, feeling anxious that my 890 Facebook friends and 325 Twitter followers won’t like my stuff and wondering if what I do is good enough to be funded anyway.

Then I got an email from an arts advisor:

“You would need to outline a strategy to us that explains how this recording project fits into a longer term plan of your career development as an artist. You need to convince us that the work is high-quality and that there is demand for it.”

And I stopped dead.

I don’t have a longer term plan of my career development as an artist – I just want to be creative. How do you convince someone that work is high-quality – isn’t that subjective? How do I know if there’s demand until I have the music to sell?

For a while I felt like giving up – maybe it’s just not worth it? Then I reread an earlier part of the email:

“… break this project up and come to us for a quick response (grant in October) in the first instance.”

Ok, it’s not an outright no, it’s a “slow down”. But I don’t want to slow down, because I’m ready to do it now – to quote my own lyrics:

“What’s happening is right, it’s good and it’s real.”

So how do I stop slowing down after a bit of a kick in the guts? Easy – change gear.

I thought, what if I fund it myself? What if decide to continue investing money into this project – as I have been doing since April – to create my own product, at my own pace, with no accountability to anyone else except me?

And then a strange thing happened – I got an email from a potential client, asking me to do some consulting work. Income.

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A revelation: So many people these days are revving their motors like maniacs! Overworked, stressed, late, constantly sick.

We need to change gear.

But in order to change gear, you need to let in the clutch. That means reducing acceleration and disengaging the motive power. Risk: stalling. Bigger risk: rolling backwards if you’re on a hill.

Risk management: the clutch.

The email I received from Creative NZ was my “clutch in”. It knocked the shit out of me. It disengaged my power and could have caused me to come to a halt. If I had reacted and decided to give  up, I could have rolled backwards and wasted the time and energy I have invested so far.

“Clutch out” was the decision to do something different – to decide on another way to fund the project. The job prospect – proof of acceleration.

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So now I feel like I’m cruising. I’m going to book a studio and record, mix and master a single. On my own. No need to prove the quality, demand or strategic fit. Maybe it’ll be good, maybe not. Maybe I’ll apply for CNZ funding for the next one. Maybe not.

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I think the world needs a gear change. I think things are revving at a very high rate. Much longer and the head gasket could go. Economic ruin. Environmental destruction. Social annihilation. All are possible.

The questions are these:

What is the “clutch in” for civilisation? The collapse of an investment company? The violent death of a baby? An oil spill?

When will we notice it? Will we respond by changing gear and letting the clutch out? Or will we grind to a halt and start rolling backwards?

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If you feel like your clutch is in and you’re about to stall or roll backwards, get in touch and I’ll help you get back in gear.